I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
