Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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