Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
