I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Randomize
