my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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