i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I touched a dick in church today
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