I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize
