We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
