She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
i think im in europe. pls send help
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
