They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Randomize
