I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize