yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
