I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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