White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
