No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
