Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
