YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I just found puke in my bra..
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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