things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
