Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I just gargled with NyQuil
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
