The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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