Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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