I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize