only if we run a train.
done.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
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