He is an equal opportunity slut.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Randomize
