The best revenge is premature balding
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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