I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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