I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
