I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
