Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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