Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Randomize
