Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
only if we run a train.
done.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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