very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
