Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
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