i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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