you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
