I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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