Kareoke will never be a sober sport
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
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