Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
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