watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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