Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
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