Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
