I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
how does that bad decision feel?
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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