i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Randomize
