Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize