My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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