MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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