It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
