I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
