Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize