You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
