Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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