I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
